Photo shot on iPhone 5s

Aching. Longing. Hurting.
The pain
of having something you can not have,
you can not touch.
Everything is a mess.
An incomprehensible jumble of 
thoughts and emotions and worries and questions and blankness.

I am afraid. 
And it is this that keeps me up at night.
That jolts me up from the friendliness of unfeelingness.

II, by S.A.Z

(praying that 
you miss me, remember me, think of me,
in a haze of liquor's apathy)